Our teachers always told us, "If you can see yourself doing anything other than acting, do it." I always took offense to this and thought to myself, "Of course I could do something else!" But now, while I've really only been seriously pursuing acting for a few months, I understand why they said this. Following your dreams is not as sparkly and fluffy as it may seem. Many people are too scared to do so, or not wanting to admit the fear, there are excuses, or just a willingness to settle for something a little less ambitious. There's a lot at stake when something means a lot to you. I don't wake up every morning with a smile on my face and say, "YES! I'm an actor!" I probably should. But the truth is, some days just suck. They don't really tell you all that much about what your day to day life is going to be like as an actor. They mainly just talk about how to act and react, how to listen and repeat...how to breathe. Good things...but what happens when you're not getting work?
Sometimes I wish I wanted to be an accountant, or even a lawyer, or sales person or teacher. Anything a little more straightforward. I think that some people can have an idea that acting is a bit of a joke...not a real job. But I believe that has a lot to do with a lack of understanding...and how can I blame them, when until recently I had no idea either!
For example: An audition takes approximately 90 seconds. How does that turn into an 8 hour day? Two words: NON-EQUITY. It means I'm not a part of the union, which means I'm the lowest of the low in the acting community. (In the Equity facility, we are not even allowed to use their toilets. Seriously. No really, I'm serious!)
So on an Equity Principal Audition day, I wake up early, get my name on the list, and wait for word on whether I will grace them with my presence or not. All the time union members casually strolling in for their appointments. Sometimes they announce that they won't be seeing us until after lunch. One thing I've learned: If I go home, there's no coming back. I don't have that kind of fortitude.
Okay, so back to the accountant. Imagine if there were accountant open calls. All the accountants from the city would come in with their head shots and resume, sign in and wait around to perform the best figure calculations...or whatever. No, if someone needs an accountant, they just go to one. People come to THEM! I wish I could just sit at home while people would call me in need of an actor. Well, I guess that does happen if you're Meryl Streep or someone. The waiting around is the hardest part. It takes strength of character; A refusal to give in to the torture of waiting.
Its not always so bad though. Sometimes you get seen quickly, or you find out right away you can just go home. Or you go see a morning movie or write your blog while you wait. You might even say I'm a "waiter" as well as an actor. Coincidence? I think not! 
The problem is there are too many actors! But what I can't understand is why?! You wait around, get rejected time and time again. Get a callback, then get rejected again. Get a job, then don't get paid. Then have to work some other crummy job to pay the bills. Not to mention that the whole time you're bearing your soul to complete strangers. We're on the front lines.
Why do we do it then? Because the reward is so great! Victory will be sweet. And because when art lives inside you, there's really nothing you can do to stop it. You ultimately can't see yourself doing anything else.  
I'll leave you with a quote from a great book I'm reading called "Got What It Takes?" By Bill Boggs. Its a very inspiring book about how successful people made it to the top in their various careers. Always be inspired!!!
"Any time you change your day-to-day, it's a risk. But you're taking it because the reward is great, if you succeed." -Bob Pittman


  1. I like this, its a good way to talk things out when you have no one to talk to.

    The hardest part is staying motivated and i think a blog could help give drive and purpose.

    Good luck!... err break a leg?

  2. I like your style of writing. It's humorous, mature and has a harsh sense of reality. Great to know that you have God on your side in addition to some great acting skills.
    Looking forward to reading more about your adventures.
    Much love.