What Not To Wear

I don’t know what it is, but I have an insanely difficult time dressing myself when I’m living in the suburbs. Most of my adolescence, I was either poked fun at because of my clothing choices, or labelled more of the free spirit type who “doesn’t care what anyone thinks” or one who “just wants to be comfortable.” And I guess that’s true. I often don’t care what anyone thinks (as long as I don't see anyone I know), and who doesn’t like to be comfortable? I don’t think anyone wakes up in the morning and thinks...I want to wear my most uncomfortable outfit today. Except perhaps Lady Gaga. I once saw her wear an outfit made of rubber. I can’t think of anything more uncomfortable than that.

BUT, shortly after I moved to Manhattan, something miraculous happened. Well, something that had its beginnings after this one time I watched The Devil Wears Prada. I decided to start dressing well. I wanted to look fashionable and to wear clothes that fit me. It helps when the majority of people around you are also trying to look trendy with well-fitting clothes (on second thought, that depends where you hang around).

All of a sudden people were saying things to me like, “you’re always dressed so well!” after which I would laugh and then thank them. My family and friends from back home would be shocked and confused when I shared some of the kind words New York Laura had received. Some of my favorites: “You look like a walking J.Crew catalogue,” “When I go shopping, I try to think about what you would wear,” and maybe the best of all, “You’re the definition of a lady.” I’m not sure what dictionary she was using.

These compliments were new to me. This is the girl who went through several purple hooded sweatshirts in her day (think: Adam Sandler’s Red Hooded Sweatshirt. You can YouTube it), and posed as a skater girl wannabe for years. Part of growing up seemed to mean giving up graphic T’s, which is a very sad and difficult parting.

And after all this, years go by, and suddenly I’m back at home wearing graphic T’s and sweatpants to the mall. If I want to get all fancy, I’ll put on some jeans. I have a closet full of high heels. Do you think I wear them? Do you?? With my graphic T’s and sweatpants?!?!?!

It really is upsetting. Somehow each day the battle is lost and comfortability wins out over fashion. My mom always said, “Fashion first.” Well, she said it a couple times.

So, if anyone happens to run into me on the deserted streets of suburbia....you may not recognize me...in the way you might not recognize Lady Gaga without her extravagance.

I was in the city last night, and let me just say that it was a rude awakening. I better get my act together! Today is a new fashion forward day. Yeah I can be a Maxxinista! Once again, fashionable Laura will reign!! I WILL be a lady!!! Scratch that...I will be a walking J.Crew catalogue! Unless I get a job at another retail store and then I’ll probably look more like that particular store. Sigh. I best choose wisely.