Agh.

"So, what have you been up to?"

Much of the time since I've graduated school I've dreaded these words.
Are you kidding me? I can't even remember what I've done today, let alone the rest of the week.
Sure...some things have happened since the spring. Progress has been made (I like to call it "character building"). 
"How's auditioning going?" "Are you in any shows?"


(really big sigh here.)
 
I've begun to realize that my answer defers depending on who I'm speaking with. The answer could range from..."Its going great! I'm learning so much." to "SCREW YOU!". 
No, that's only my inner monologue. My answer is more classy, like: "Not good. It sucks." And I guess they can both be true at different times. But the truth is that no one really understands unless they're in the arts in some form.
I met up with my friend from school last week and we laughed as we rejoiced in each others' misery. It just feels good to have someone else know what you're going through!
I'm learning that a lot of the battle is just staying inspired. Continuing to move forward in this marathon. I've been reading, "Wake up, I'm Fat!" by Camryn Manheim, and its incredible to read about her life and what she went through to make it big. She works hard, stands up for what she believes in and confidently goes after what she wants in life. She doesn't give up or give in! She inspires me to go after my dreams (and its interesting how they've changed even since starting this blog) and to really fight for them.
There are so many options available for our generation. But that can be a challenge though, can't it? What do I really want? I can do ANYTHING I want to do! Sometimes that's too much to handle. Can't someone just tell me what to do?? But I guess as we continue to climb up to new plateaus in our lives, we can see more clearly what our goals are. Maybe our new goals. And often these desires can also be masked by our emotions - our fears, our desire to please, our pride. I've wanted to do comedy since high school, but I've never done anything about it!
Well, a new day is dawning...and the time is ticking so I better get myself a plan of action and go for it. Maybe Tiny Fey and I can discuss it over lunch. After her Mark Twain award stuff settles down of course.
I better go rehearse my conversations with family over the holidays. Its funny cause I really thought I'd have been in a show by now or at least have one in store for next year. HA! Oh well. 
2011 is going to be INCREDIBLE!! I can feel it!!!!! 

Things that have inspired me lately:

-"Whip It" the movie

-Late-Night television

-Learning how many amazing Canadians there really are (i'll make a list at a further date)

"Occasionally you really are at the crossroads. And when those two roads diverge, your creature of habit self starts to push you down the path most taken, but your gut tells you that maybe this is the defining moment when you have to take the road less traveled."      -Camryn Manheim, Wake up, I'm Fat!